Question: Can you tell us about other types of exercises?

One type of exercise is called Reintegrative Protocol. I did it once on the phone with Yosef Nicolosi Jr., the son of the late Yosef Nicolosi Sr. and creator of Reparative Therapy. I found the exercise to be very effective.

In the exercise, I was directed to visualize a fantasy scene in which I was one of the participants. I didn’t have to describe the scene to the Dr. Nicolosi, so only I understood exactly what was going on in the scene. If you have ever dreamed about something in the past, you might understand that the visuals come from your eyes: YOU are looking at the various scenes that are happening in front and around you. That is what I was doing here, so I was experiencing a “normal” fantasy scene.

But then he told me to turn the “camera” around. So instead of looking at an attractive scene with an attractive man in front of my eyes, I was instead looking back at myself participating in this scene. That meant I was looking at myself, the Rabbi, with my white beard and black hat, doing something that was not very pleasant to watch.

I quickly “turned off” this camera so I would not need to see it any longer, but the damage was done. I realized that whenever I fantasized, I never saw myself in the fantasy; it was always a fantasy that started from my eyes and looked outward. But once the cameras were turned back on me, that literally changed the picture.

Whenever I have these thoughts in my daily life, I can use this method again. Instead of fantasizing of what it would be like to participate in this scene with another person from my point of view, I instead look the other way and see myself participating. As soon as that happens, I say to myself, “NO!” and do not pursue it further.

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